Book Offer FAQ - National Marriage Encounter Prison Ministry, Inc.

Can I order the book TIME BY Mail online?

No, the book can only be ordered by mail and paid by check or money order. It cannot be ordered online or by phone. Return to BOOK ORDER for information on ordering books.

My nephew (friend, etc.) is incarcerated and the stress is very hard on his marriage. Can I order the books for them?

Yes, you definitely can. That is a wonderful gift to give them the tools to strengthen their marriage at this difficult time. Simply follow the instructions for ordering books on the previous page.

Are the talks I read on the website (Marriage Encounter link) the same as the talks given in the book, T.I.M.E. By Mail?

The topics are the same but the talks are different. The special part of Marriage Encounter talks is the deep sharing of the couple's personal experiences and feelings. All of the talks on the website are given by different couples from those given in the book. Therefore, even when the topics are the same, the talks are very different.

Does the website cover the same topics as the T.I.M.E. By Mail book?

The book covers all of the topics which make up the 12 steps of the Marriage Encounter program. The website gives about 6 talks, covering about half of the steps.

Are the questions on the website the same as in the book?

Yes, but since the book covers more topics, it also has more questions.

I notice that the talks were written by inmates and their outside spouse. How did you get couples to write these talks?

All the talks in the book and on the website were prepared by couples who gave them at a Marriage Encounter program in prison. First these couples participated in a M.E. program inside the institution where one spouse was incarcerated. The other spouse entered the institution with the Team Couples each day and went out at night. After experiencing the entire program, these couples generously offered to prepare talks to give at the next M.E. at the same institution. They spent a lot of time writing, mailing their talks to each other and having them checked (by mail) by a Team Couple from NMEPM. They did all this because they wanted to help others. We have changed their names to protect their identity.

Exactly how different are the Questions for Engaged Couples from the questions in the book or those on the website?

Sometimes the questions are very similar. At other times they’re quite different.

As an example, in the Marriage Encounter there’s a step called "Marriage in the Plan of God" which deals with our need to be united.
Questions in the T.I.M.E. By Mail book are:

What are the three events in our married life that have united us most?
How do I feel about these events?
How is God using this time of physical separation to unite us?

Questions for Engaged Couples are:

Describe two events in our engagement period that united us most?
How did I feel God’s presence at those times?
What makes me think that marrying you is what God wants me to do?
Is a Church wedding important to me?
When was the last time I had to decide to love you when it wasn’t easy?

(This talk is not given on the website.)

My husband and I are getting a lot out of the T.I.M.E. By Mail book. We hate to see it end. Do you have a next step?

I'm glad that you and your husband are getting a lot out of our book. That tells me that you are both putting effort into it. I'm happy that you're doing that. At the end of the Marriage Encounter program, on pages 114 & 115, a couple explains how they started to Dialogue by Mail after their M.E. The questions they used are on pages 116 & 117. Before the TIME book was written, this was the only resource we had to offer couples who were separated by incarceration and could not attend a M. E. program in the prison. When we present Marriage Encounter programs in prison couples often come back to attend more than one. They often hear the same talks, depending on whether they get the same team couples or different ones. To help make the experience more meaningful for them, we have created new questions for couples making repeated encounters. You'll find those questions in the book on page 122. You use them as you reread the book.

Another way to get different talks is to go to our web site and read the presentations under Marriage Encounter. There are more talks by inmates and their spouses in Four Phases I hope these suggestions are helpful to you. My husband and I have never experienced prison life, but the principles we learned from Marriage Encounter continue to help us year after year as our lives change. I wish the same for you and your husband.